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| I'm really considering going there. plus the fact my parents want to move there. i love the idea. I would live on campus because they want to live in cape coral or fort myers. so i really hope that some time this summer i can go visit and see what its all about. I've noticed that I've been looking at universities in Ireland and london and found a couple but my parents would be scared to send me off. also is it weird that i'm more afraid of going to college in florida than i am to go to college in ireland??? just asking. | |
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| How are you my good old friend? me? you ask well, I'm actually really well. I found that since i broke up with my boyfriend that all i really wanted was someone to hold me. He is an amazing guy and any girl that gets him is lucky, i guess that lately that I'm in love with the idea of love, and would like to some day, just to know how it feels.
So on another note. My best friend Cait, Left me for st. ambrose. And sarah well we havent talked since my Grandfather passed. But i hope to talk to her and possibly hang out with her over the weekend. I'm currently looking for a job, which i have horrible luck with. I've been reading a lot.
I feel as if I'm in love. but not with anyone specific. I guess I'm in love with life. I haven't hung out with any of my friends, but i hope to soon. So in my History 109 there is this guy that looks like paul walker with a getto slang and a ankle tracker ( The name for it escapes me). he's still cute... if he didnt talk. I met this guy in my OCS class. He's cool. we were talking about moving to Cali. i said i was looking at san fran and LA he was looking at the same. My teachers a cool. I love my mass communications teacher. He's great, he's teaching us all this stuff about how the internet cant be defined by the word and definition "MEDIA" because its something different. We're also studying all these ideas of it. I really enjoy it.
so I must leave you with this last thought.
Don't fret about Men. Worry about yourself first. then everything else will come. trust me. Its better to be happy with your self than be unhappy and with some one. | |
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|  Currently just arrived in Florida! The weather is amazing. I got a date to prom, because mine skipped out on me. (FUN) so I’m taking Pat. It’s funny because since I’ve known him we said we were going to go to prom. Hopefully we can go camping afterwards. I REALLY want to go. its on the fact of convincing my mother. The good thing is we’re not drinking or any of that shiz. We’re just going to chill and sing songs around the camp fire. The thing is that my best friends BF which is my Best friend hates my date. So this is going to be interesting. So what did we do these past couple days Kiddies? Crisitna Got a blogger with the Title Of BRAIN Vomit! criss-brainvomit.blogspot.com/ Lol. She saw spring happen. AND she is taking another guy to prom that is not her BF. How are we going to explain this one? Well till next time
Will love from the sunshine state
Criss | |
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| recently i have been fine. but im with a guy that a lot of people dont like and i feel if i tell some one that im going to get bombarded with "dont date him!" ugh.. Their is only a few girls i cant talk to him about.yes smitty your one of them. i love you for that. also theres another guy that i think i like but i dont wanna like. ugh. so this weekend me and tom are going to the mall. i feel like he has a tendencie to tell me what to do. i called him out on it and we talked which was really good. Also were going to the mall on saturday, he wants to buy me stuff and some people will say thats great I hate it. i feel like im depening on him. i told him i rather not because i dont have any money. but he insits on buying me clothes. UGH why. it just feels odd i like buying my own things. i feel weird and gulty when my famliy buys me stuff. i feel super akward when im standing next to the person while they pay for me. | |
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| I had about 3 anxiety attacks yesterday. I feel when she gets mad I beat myself up for no doing it right I’m a perfectionist when it comes to handling other peoples things. Tom had told me he loved me. That was a lot to take in. I wanted to go slow and I made the mistake of saying it to him. I feel like crying. Some Say that love is worth fighting for. But why? I don’t know what to say I wish I could just click my heels together and go home. But not the home with mom or dad the home where I can run away too. the one in that far off distant land where no one will find me, where it’s that moment in time where everything is okay. I just feel the pressure. I’m okay with it but it’s starting to become too much. | |
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| Sometimes this isnt fair
The way you
Touch her
That could have been me
What makes her different?
What made me wrong?
I sit here watching the rose blush
I have one of my own,
But you were the first,
the only one.
Young moments where time stops
Where you never grow old
You never grow apart
i see the moments in time
Whats the point of this?
I do this to myself.
I try to find new YOU
but YOU is al i see.
I have no choice
This isnt what i wanted
This is what i live with.
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| One thing i hate about going to an all girls school are the ideas of guys. Ugh. a girl goes out with a guy then you go out with that same guy and things are ACKWARD! then you might be lucky and get a girl where you laugh at it. But i feel so used when i see him. the way he acts, like he throws girls away and comes to them when he needs them. We had deep talk and how it makes us feel.But it seems that he doesnt care. Do i have the green eye?? idk i just want to tell the girl that he's holding becareful with this one. But if i do i feel like im going against our friendship. the tom boy and the boy relationship. i always told him to go for the girl. but when it come down to it. i think i created a monster. i was the one that told him to be confident. I tell him i havea BF he still wants to play. UGH! then when i say no he Run to the next best thing. It still makes me feel bad and i dont know why. ohh well and i havent talked to Tom since two days ago.. i feel bad. i tried calling him but he didnt answer. i really needed to talk to him. i was having a bad day... :( oh well. laters loves
Criss. | |
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| so there is the musical coming up and i really excited. i just wish there was a book called "being a Crew Manager" i feel like im letting G down. i feel like im a crappy crew manager. :( Today is the variety show! hope some people will try out. Crew Nikky is thinking of doing crew and Pat doesn’t care for him... DUN DUN DUN. Ha! oh well. Im hoping to go to Toms this weekend. Im freaking out about meeting his parents.
: /
So yesterday my mom freaked i was late getting to the car.. So i was call "Stupid". that was a new one for her. my mom told me that if it happens again then im out of the musical. i love how she said that she wasnt going to threaten me about it and here we go. I keep to myself. i dont get into trouble. and im in school activities. I love how im the black sheep. She pulled the guilt trip again. I told her i will take the Damn bus sho she can eat on time and her blood sugar is high. I dont mind taking the bus. She's worried but i need to Go out in to the world i need to learn. | |
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| waiting on a bus...... fun.... i got on the wrong one. angered at the fact that my mother doesn't support the fact that i need to stay after. I politely asked her if it would be okay for me to take the car. she went on a rant that 1) we dont have the money 2) if we didnt have to take the trip for my college she could have payed for it. 3) that i should know about the money issues.... ugh i'm really considering not going to prom so i don't get THAT thrown in my face. Here is a list of things i NEED to do. 1) Call eddie for the adds - my brother is incapable to be dependent on. >: /
2) See if i would be able to see my father because i haven't seen him, :( and it would be a month this weekend
3) do CPR powerpoint
4) do CPR poster
5) english powerpoint<a
so currently i'm
6) buy fences
7)read Fences to page 25
8) take about 75 photos canidid and Posed for monday
9) Do 24 questions for world religions.
10) figure out what im going to wear on monday for WQoP
11) Go to Senior Vid which starts at 10:00 am
12) stay after Senior Vid for crew till 6:30
13) Clean MY ROOM!!! i dont like it messy
14) laundry
15) film Frosh and edit Arts with out borders for G
16) build machine where i could stop time and finish everything i can in just a few seconds
* i really would like to spend some time with tom. i cant seem to get him out of my head..... thats a new feeling for me...
so im just getting home 7:00
i thought it was funny
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| So yesterday was valentines day and mine was actually really fun. I hope all of yours was too. I find that when you let yourself go you become friends with the most interesting people. So yesterday I went to dinner movies cuddled and kissed under the stars(cheesy enough for ya?) and i loved it… it felt odd letting my self be myself around a guy I really like. After the incident with Shawn I rather that not happen again. I find myself at odds with my emotions. I don’t want to get hurt nor do I want to be alone. I think I’m ready for a relationship and I do care for him. Maybe it could work…… I talked to my friend Andy. He’s getting engaged! Im soo happy for him. My friend tony is looking for a girl. I felt bad because is a good guy but girls don’t give him a chance. so the photoshoot im uber excited!!! I cant wait! Well I hope many of you had a fun filled weekend. Talk to you later my LJ peeps. Love always
Criss | |
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criss4291's journal
